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Someday I will not feel gutted after watching these two Team Revolution girls race. Someday I won't feel so stressed out, as if my whole heart hangs on my sleeve as I watch them, lap after lap move, struggle, make ground, lose ground, look tired, spent, oxygen-deprived, like it's the worst kind of suffering one can do on a bike. I watch and yell and wish and give all the vibes I know how to give. Someday, it will feel better, right?
Katie finished 59th and Carrie 71st. I watched hopefully, helplessly as the pros hammered in and the field filed behind. The field. Nearly a hundred left in this stage race and they all filed in together...places seemed somewhat arbitrarily assigned unless you were in the top 20. I have it recorded and will try and post it on YouTube eventually.
I'm sorry. I'm disheartened tonight. I failed Katie at the time-trial by letting her miss her real start time. I offer nothing except constant condolences since I didn't know what to expect here. Experience? We're all getting a fair share of lessons. But I think we all wanted more. I wanted more. A better story. An exciting story about an underdog team of two women that made a name here. The announcers scrambling to find more info on this team they'd never heard of.
I wanted the Disney version of the week and instead I'm getting the full dose of reality TV. It's really freaking hard.
The good news is that we're all still in. Here's to surviving one more day of suffering and putting hope in dreams tomorrow. 86 mile road race....